Scientists Discover Black Hole Leads to Warren, Manitoba

Black Hole
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Information not previously released to the public regarding a small probe sent towards Messier 87 in the Virgo Galaxy decades ago with the intent to fall into the black hole has surfaced today.

According to a source the probe, code name Little Dipper, was approaching the black hole in mid-January this year when transmissions suddenly stopped. It was suspected the gravitational pull of the black hole had damaged Little Dipper or that it had been sucked into the black hole. However, last week the transmissions from Little Dipper recommenced with audio and visual material of what appeared to be the parking lot behind a hockey arena. The location of Little Dipper was triangulated, and the probe was recovered from the back of the South Interlake Rec Centre Sunova Arena in Warren, Manitoba. The area behind the arena has been cordoned off and an investigation is underway. Our source has indicated that a wormhole may be present, but it could also just be a sewer drain underneath a slushy pile of discarded snow.

Local resident and part-time Zamboni driver Pete Nickel was not surprised that Little Dipper had been discovered in Warren, “I lived in this town my whole life, grew up here, raised my family here and over the years I seen all kinds of weird sh*t in the sky around this place. This thing they found out the back of the rink was probably put there by dem aliens.” When questioned further about the aliens Peter added, “You stay a few weeks in Warren and you’ll know.” At this time no further details are available regarding Little Dipper’s journey to the Virgo Galaxy nor its subsequent return to Earth.

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